"I have a thousand years of power."

Crusader Nabbed By Michigan Cops
Medieval sword, mallet, armor no match for ye olde Taser

AUGUST 5–Meet Robert McClain. The Michigan man, 42, was arrested last week after he attempted to literally go medieval on cops. According to the below Royal Oak Police Department report, officers were dispatched to McClain's home after a motorist called 911 to report that McClain had fled the scene of an auto accident. When they arrived at his crib, McClain allegedly tried to strike a cop with a four-foot sword. After missing, McClain retreated to his basement, where he donned a chainmail armored vest and leather gauntlets to protect his arms. He also added a giant wooden mallet to his arsenal and beckoned officers to come downstairs and get him. "I'm gonna crush your fucking skulls," McClain warned. Then, in a nice rhetorical flourish (for a lunatic, at least), he added, "I have a thousand years of power." That omnipotence, however, was no match for a police Taser, which felled McClain. He was then carted off and charged with felony assault and a misdemeanor count for failing to remain at an accident scene. (3 pages)


This fucking flake lives about 5 miles from my house. haha.

Thanks to for the link. This made my day.

8 thoughts on “"I have a thousand years of power."”

  1. a preference for medieval arms and armor…
    more power to you.

    but hit-and-run, more so, attempted injury of a peace officer, that pisses me off no matter what the method.

    (sorry, I'm just trying to wake up and am not fully there)

  2. I have to say

    While he may not have had "1000 years of power" before that Taser hit his chain mail, he certainly had 1000 volts of power afterward. Clearly, if one is resisting arrest, wearing a conductive shirt is not a good idea.

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